Many of the new moms I work with struggle most with allowing themselves to accept support. There is still a heavy expectation that we carry that we’re supposed to be able to do it all, and that if we need help we’re failing.
Allowing yourself to accept help, care, and support is a vital part of honoring and valuing the work that we do as mothers. We do not have to do it alone.
If you have trouble accepting or asking for help, ask yourself if there is a fear, worry, or judgment underneath your resistance. Do you think that needing help means failure? Are you worried that accepting help means someone else will judge your parenting? If there are some negative/unhelpful thoughts that come up, you might need an affirmation or validating statement to reassure yourself, like “I am a good mother even if I need help,” or “I am doing my best, and others can see that.” You might also look back at our recent post for other affirmations.
It’s also important to feel connected to others, and giving/receiving support is a big part of that. Reflect on how good it feels to connect with someone over a shared interest, or to be able to relate with someone else. Allowing more support can also pay off in positive interactions and feelings. You are worthy and deserving of love and support – from and for yourself and others!